Silent Warrior

Day 4 : This post is part of Writing 101 Blogging.U Challenge.

Today, write about a loss. The twist: make this the first post in a three-post series.

I probably wouldn’t want to make a series post out of a tragic loss. So I will skip the twist today.

I have always been a pet lover. Animals and birds make me curious. But my dad isn’t really fond of animals and always discouraged  having pets. My mom had all the living animals that ever existed on Earth, back in her home during her childhood. Granny was a pet person too.  So since I wasn’t officially allowed to have pets, I get over excited when I see a stray cat in my neighborhood. Let’s just say it was a nice area and you wouldn’t meet a skimpy little thin cat. All the kittens and cats were nicely fed and were all too fluffy.

So there was a cat, a grayish black American short-hair kind of kitty. We had a huge garden and this always comes and claims its space. We fed it too well and became particularly fond of this cat, compared to the other three that take a stroll or a nap in my garden. Myself and mom named it Paussy. Mom says I came up with the name ; God knows where did I get that from.  I was around 9 years old and my entire life was spent at the garden with Paussy. I wasnt having mobile back then, so not much of cat-selfies. But I always played around with her. She was a playful cat too. I crown her with an inverted Hibiscus from my garden and she stays just like that, so that it wouldn’t fall.  Even if it falls, it ll bend down and stay still so that we’ll keep the tiara again. 🙂 If my mom stands just next her , she ll come a step forward and lie down with her head on my mom’s foot for added comfort. Doesn’t give a damn how much ever I meow at her. She was an absolutely adorable cat. Too special.

As I said, my garden was huge. Too many trees, plants, shrubs, crawly insects, and snakes. Actually we knew about one, but there were many tiny snakes later. One day when I was at school, mom had seen paussy having a bad fight with a little snake. By the time mom called for help so that the snake could be picked up, and rushed back to the garden..the little snake was dead. Mom felt bad, but also proud that Paussy defended us. God knows, the snake could have bit me too, for the amount of time I spend in the garden!

Just a couple of days later, mom and my neighbors found Paussy dead in the garden and they found it to be snake poisoning. Nothing will ever reciprocate this loss. Nothing will make this pain go away. Having a pet, losing it when it ages and dies a peacefull death is different. But when the pet – not even completely, dies saving you, it’s a heart ache that will never heal.

Paussy was a savior. Will always be remembered.

Not Paussy – but she looked just like that

And to how has it affected me? Guilt. I don’t know how I could have saved it.. but maybe I shouldn’t have showed so much of affection that it always stayed at my place. I don’t know what and why, I became a more reserved and silent person after that and people were starting to become worried. I’m stable now, and dad might easily agree for a pet, but the fear of loss has a very deep root within me now. Also, Paussy will be irreplaceable.



16 thoughts on “Silent Warrior

  1. Beautiful story, and very well written. I am not really a cat person, but I did engage with the story. Well done for writing it, and I am so sorry for your loss.


  2. Beautiful story. I found so much joy in the midst of your heartache. So sorry for your loss. Paussy was a wonderful kitty. 🙂

    You actually inspired me to add a kitty story to my three-part series, so thank you! 😀 I look forward to reading the remainder of your story..

    ~ Angela


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